Biblical Responses to Difficult People

In a world full of diverse personalities, encountering difficult people is inevitable—whether at work, in family gatherings, or even within our communities of faith. As Christians, how do we navigate these challenging interactions without losing our peace or compromising our values? The Bible offers timeless wisdom on this topic, guiding us toward responses that reflect God’s grace and love.

Drawing from key Scriptures, here are seven practical, biblically grounded ways to handle difficult people. These aren’t just theoretical; they’re modelled by Jesus and others in the Bible, showing us how to respond with wisdom and compassion.

1. Realize You Cannot Please Everybody (John 5:31)

In John 5:31, Jesus says, “If I testify about Myself, My testimony is not valid.” Here, Jesus is dealing with skeptics and critics who question His authority. Instead of trying to win them over through self-defense, He points to external witnesses: John the Baptist, His miracles, the Father, and the Scriptures.

The lesson? Not everyone will approve of you, no matter how right or well-intentioned you are. Chasing universal approval leads to exhaustion and compromise. Instead, focus on pleasing God. In practice, this means setting healthy boundaries and not internalizing every criticism. Next time someone challenges you unreasonably, remember: your worth isn’t defined by their opinion.

2. Refuse to Play Their Game (Matt 22:18)

“But perceiving their malice, Jesus said, ‘Why are you testing Me, hypocrites? Show Me the coin used for the tax.’ So they brought Him a denarius. ‘Whose image and inscription is this?’ He asked them.” (Matt 22:18-20 HCSB)

The Pharisees tried to trap Jesus into a no-win situation by pitting Him against Roman authority on taxes. Rather than engaging in their manipulative debate, Jesus redirected the conversation with a question that exposed their hypocrisy and shifted the focus to deeper truth.

Application: Difficult people often bait us into arguments or power struggles. Don’t take the bait. Respond calmly, ask clarifying questions, or redirect to neutral ground. This preserves your energy and models maturity—think of it as sidestepping a verbal minefield.

3. Never Retaliate (Matt 5:38-39)

“You have heard that it was said, An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth. But I tell you, don’t resist an evildoer. On the contrary, if anyone slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also.” (Matt 5:38-39 HCSB)

Jesus challenges the Old Testament’s eye-for-an-eye justice system, urging us to break the cycle of revenge. Retaliation only escalates conflict and hardens hearts.

In real life, this could mean absorbing a harsh word without firing back, or responding to aggression with unexpected kindness. It’s not about being a doormat but trusting God as your defender. Studies on conflict resolution echo this: non-retaliatory responses often de-escalate situations faster than confrontation.

4. Pray for Them (Matt 5:44-45)

“But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. For He causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.” (Matt 5:44-45 HCSB)

Prayer is a powerful weapon against bitterness. Jesus commands us to pray for those who wrong us, mirroring God’s impartial love. This shifts our perspective from victimhood to empathy—perhaps that difficult person is hurting or lost.

Try it: Next time someone frustrates you, pause and pray specifically for their well-being. Over time, this can soften your heart and even transform the relationship. As one biblical commentator notes, prayer aligns us with God’s redemptive purposes.

5. Control Your Temper (2 Corinthians 5:16-19)

“From now on, then, we do not know anyone in a purely human way … He has committed the message of reconciliation to us.” (2 Cor. 5:16-19 HCSB)

Paul reminds us to view people through a spiritual lens, not just human frustration. We’re ambassadors of reconciliation, called to bridge divides rather than widen them with angry outbursts.

Controlling your temper means pausing before reacting—count to ten, take a deep breath, or step away. This biblical principle promotes emotional intelligence, helping us respond as representatives of Christ. In heated moments, ask: “How can I foster reconciliation here?”

6. Be Quick to Forgive and Even Quicker to Ask for Forgiveness (Matthew 6:14-15)

“For if you forgive people their wrongdoing, your heavenly Father will forgive you as well. But if you don’t forgive people, your Father will not forgive your wrongdoing.” (Matt 6:14-15 HCSB)

Forgiveness is non-negotiable in the Christian life. Jesus ties our forgiveness from God to our willingness to forgive others. Moreover, we should be proactive in seeking forgiveness when we’ve erred.

This dual approach heals relationships: forgive freely to release resentment, and apologize swiftly to own your part. It’s liberating—holding grudges weighs you down, while forgiveness frees you. Remember, it’s not about forgetting but choosing not to let offenses define the future.

7. Remember That Everything Has God’s Fingerprints on It (Job 9:3-5)

“If one wanted to take Him to court, he could not answer God once in a thousand [times]. God is wise and all–powerful. Who has opposed Him and come out unharmed? He removes mountains without their knowledge, overturning them in His anger.” (Job 9:3-5 HCSB)

Job acknowledges God’s sovereignty amid suffering and difficult circumstances. Even when people or situations seem out of control, God is ultimately in charge—His “fingerprints” are on everything.

This perspective brings peace: difficult people don’t have the final say; God does. Trust His wisdom and power to work things out. In trials, reflect on Romans 8:28—He turns all things for good for those who love Him.

Wrapping Up: Grace in the Midst of Friction

Dealing with difficult people tests our faith, but these biblical responses equip us to handle them with grace, wisdom, and love. By realizing we can’t please everyone, refusing manipulative games, avoiding retaliation, praying earnestly, controlling our reactions, forgiving quickly, and trusting God’s sovereignty, we not only survive these encounters but grow spiritually.

Which of these resonates most with you? Share in the comments below—let’s encourage one another. For more insights on biblical living, check out resources like GotQuestions.org or OpenBible.info. Remember, as followers of Christ, our responses can point others to Him.

Why Your Church Needs to Be More Like Canadian Tire and Less Like Eaton’s

I grew up flipping through the Eaton’s Christmas catalogue like it was the Sears Wish Book on steroids. Downtown Eaton’s stores felt like palaces. Then, in 1999, it all vanished. Bankruptcy. Lights out. Gone forever.

A few blocks away, The Bay kept limping along. They tried a luxury makeover with Saks, launched a website nobody used, and kept paying rent on massive downtown buildings nobody visited. Today they’re still open — sort of. But if you’re under 35, you probably walk past The Bay and think, “Oh yeah, my grandma buys towels there.”

Then there’s Canadian Tire. Same company that’s been around since 1922. Same red triangle. Same “Canadian” in the name. Yet somehow they’re bigger, more profitable, and more relevant in 2025 than they were in 1995. They added autocentres when people wanted more than wrenches. They built giant new stores. They nailed online ordering and curbside pickup before most churches figured out Zoom. They launched one of the best loyalty programs in the country. Same mission. Completely updated methods.

Three iconic Canadian brands. Three different responses to a changing world. Three very different outcomes.

And every local church is writing the exact same story right now.

The message of Jesus never changes — full stop. But the methods we use to deliver that message must change, or we will slowly (or suddenly) become irrelevant to the very people Jesus died to reach.

Revitalization isn’t about chasing trends. It’s not about becoming “cool” or copying the megachurch down the road. It’s about ruthless obedience: refusing to let our love for the past keep the next generation from a future with Jesus.

  • Eaton’s churches say, “We’ve never done it that way before,” and one day the doors close for good.
  • Bay churches make a few cosmetic changes, survive on the generosity of the 55+ crowd, and slowly fade into a museum.
  • Canadian Tire churches ask, “What has to change so that more people can meet Jesus?” — and then they actually do it.

Here’s the scary truth: most of our kids aren’t rejecting Jesus. They’re rejecting the version of church we keep serving them on 1995 (or 1965) china.

So let’s stop being shocked that young families aren’t showing up for 1995. Let’s start asking what we’re willing to lose so they can gain Christ.

Because Jesus didn’t call us to preserve our preferences. He called us to make disciples of the people who don’t look like us, sing like us, or even vote like us.

Canadian Tire didn’t become stronger by clinging to the past. They became stronger by staying married to the mission while changing everything else.

Imagine if we loved the mission of Jesus that much.

Imagine if we decided that reaching the next generation was worth killing every sacred cow we’ve been feeding for over thirty years.

That’s what revitalization actually is. And the good news? We still have time to choose which story will be ours.

Let’s not leave a legacy of “Remember when this place used to be full?” Let’s leave a legacy of “Look what Jesus is still doing here.”

Who’s ready to pick up the wrench and get to work?

10 Critical Errors That KILL Church Revitalization And How to Avoid Them

You’ve been called to lead a turnaround. Don’t let these 10 fatal mistakes bury your church.

“Revitalization is 10% strategy and 90% spiritual leadership.” — Tom Cheyney & Ron Edmondson

Tom Cheyney (Founder, The Renovate Group) and Ron Edmondson (RE Consulting) revealed the 10 most common — and deadly — errors pastors make in church revitalization.

This isn’t theory. This is battle-tested wisdom from the trenches.

Error #1: Not Bathing Everything in Prayer

(Strategy without Spirit = stagnation.)

You plan. You strategize. You launch initiatives. But where is the prayer?

Red Flags:

  • Prayer meetings are optional
  • Decisions made in boardrooms, not on knees
  • “We’ll pray about it” becomes a stall tactic

Fix It:

  • Daily war room prayer (pastor + 3 leaders)
  • Pre-service prayer 30 minutes before worship
  • 40-day prayer guide for the church
  • Text prayer chain: “PRAYNOW” → urgent needs

Scripture: “Unless the Lord builds the house, they labor in vain who build it.” (Psalm 127:1)

Error #2: Moving Too Fast

(Speed kills trust.)

You arrive with a 90-day plan and a wrecking ball. Result? Resistance. Rebellion. Resignations.

Red Flags:

  • Major changes in first 6 months
  • “We’ve always done it this way” becomes a battle cry
  • Key families leave

Fix It:

  • First 90 days = Listen, Learn, Love
  • Honor the past before changing the future
  • One change per quarter (max)
  • Use “Pilot Programs”: Test small, celebrate wins

Error #3: Moving Too Slow

(Momentum dies in the mud.)

You wait for “consensus.” You delay decisions. The church atrophies.

Red Flags:

  • “We’ll vote on it next year”
  • Same budget, same ministries, same decline
  • Young families leave for growing churches

Fix It:

  • Set 12-month “Non-Negotiables”
  • Use 30-60-90 day sprints
  • Communicate urgency:

    “We love this church too much to let it die.”

  • Celebrate quick wins weekly

Error #4: Ignoring the Past Success of the Church

(Rediscover. Don’t reinvent.)

You act like the church has never done anything right. You erase history. You lose hearts.

Red Flags:

  • Old photos removed
  • Former pastors never mentioned
  • “That was then, this is now” attitude

Fix It:

  • “Heritage Sunday” — celebrate founding, baptisms, missions
  • Interview 3 legacy members: “What made this church great?”
  • Build on DNA: If outreach was strong, revive it
  • Slogan: “Honouring yesterday. Building tomorrow.”

Error #5: Not Embracing Conflict

(Avoiding conflict = avoiding change.)

You dodge tough talks. You hope issues “resolve themselves.” They fester.

Red Flags:

  • Gossip in parking lot
  • Silent treatment in meetings
  • Pastor becomes the bottleneck

Fix It:

  • Matthew 18 in action: Address privately, quickly
  • “Conflict Resolution Team” (trained, neutral)
  • Teach: “Iron sharpens iron” (Proverbs 27:17)
  • Model vulnerability: Share your own struggles

Error #6: Dreaming Too Small

(God-sized vision requires God-sized faith.)

You aim to “survive.” You budget for decline. You cap God’s power.

Red Flags:

  • Vision: “Keep the doors open”
  • Goals: “Add 5 new members”
  • Prayers: “Help us pay the light bill”

Fix It:

  • Ask: “What could God do here in 5 years?”
  • Cast vision monthly (sermons, videos, stories)
  • Set BHAGs (Big Hairy Audacious Goals)
  • Celebrate faith steps: “We baptized 12 — imagine 50!”*

Error #7: Trying to Save a Church That Can’t Be Saved

(Some churches need to die to be reborn.)

You pour blood, sweat, and tears into a corpse. God may be calling you to hospice — or a restart.

Red Flags:

  • <50 in worship for 5+ years
  • No conversions in 3+ years
  • Building worth more than ministry
  • Leadership refuses all change

Fix It:

  • Honest assessment with denominational leader
  • Options:
    • Merge
    • Restart
    • Adopt
    • Close with dignity
  • Pray: “Lord, is this sheep lost — or dead?”

Error #8: Not Having a Long-Term Approach

(Revitalization is a marathon, not a sprint.)

You expect results in 12 months. You quit when momentum lags. You miss the harvest.

Red Flags:

  • “If it doesn’t work in 6 months, I’m out”
  • No 3-5 year plan
  • Burnout by year 2

Fix It:

  • 5-Year Vision Map
    • Year 1: Stabilize
    • Year 2: Strategize
    • Year 3: Mobilize
    • Year 4: Multiply
    • Year 5: Mature
  • Annual “State of the Church” address
  • Sabbatical every 7 years

Error #9: Ignoring the Emotional Cost of Change

(People don’t resist change — they resist loss.)

You push vision. They grieve traditions. You lose them.

Red Flags:

  • “We’ve always…” is the loudest voice
  • Funerals for ministries
  • Pastor labeled “the destroyer”

Fix It:

  • Grieve well: Hold a “Farewell Service” for old ways
  • Tell the ‘Why’ 7 times, 7 ways
  • Create new traditions immediately
  • Counselling fund for staff/volunteers

Error #10: Not Protecting Your Family

(If your home falls, your ministry fails.)

You sacrifice spouse and kids on the altar of revival. They resent the church. You lose everything.

Red Flags:

  • Kids dread Sundays
  • Spouse feels like a ministry widow/er
  • Family dinner = staff meeting

Fix It:

  • Non-Negotiable Family Rules:
    • Date night weekly
    • Family dinner 4x/week
    • No church talk at home after 8 PM
  • “Pastor’s Family Sabbath” — 1 weekend off/quarter
  • Spouse on leadership team (optional, but informed)
  • Counselling for all — preventative, not crisis

 

Your Revitalization Self-Assessment

Error Self-Score (1–10) Next Step
Prayer
Pace
Past
Conflict
Vision
Realism
Timeline
Emotions
Family

Action: Pick ONE error to fix this month. Share with an accountability partner.

How to Get Others to Follow Your Church Revitalization Leadership

No one follows a leader without being motivated to do so. In every church experiencing renewal, where people are rallying around their leader’s vision, there are reasons behind that willingness to follow.

Sometimes local circumstances play a part—perhaps a revitalizer steps into a congregation with a long-standing legacy, or the church is ready for a fresh start after years of decline. But most often, people follow a church revitalizer because of intentional actions—consistent steps that build trust, purpose, and hope.

If you want people to follow you as you lead your church toward health and growth, here are several key actions you can take to motivate others to walk beside you.

1. Help Your People Feel Important Again

In a declining or discouraged church, many members feel forgotten or unneeded. One of the greatest things a revitalizing leader can do is restore a sense of value to every person in the congregation.

People want to know that they matter—that their gifts, prayers, and presence contribute to something greater.

In small churches, losing one volunteer can feel like losing a whole ministry. In larger churches, discouragement in one department can spread quickly. That’s why revitalizers must take the time to affirm and encourage.

Remind people how their faithfulness strengthens the church’s mission. Celebrate progress, no matter how small. Let each person know: “You are vital to what God is rebuilding here.”

2. Show Your Followers Where They Are Going

Church revitalization requires a clear, compelling direction. Without vision, enthusiasm fades.

Proverbs 29:18 reminds us:

“Where there is no vision, the people perish.”

If you don’t know where you’re going, neither will anyone else. As a revitalizer, spend time seeking God’s heart for your church’s future. Clarify your purpose and communicate it boldly.

Vision is more than a slogan—it’s an invitation to be part of something that matters. When you share it with energy and conviction, people are drawn to it.

A well-defined, Spirit-led vision—shared consistently and passionately—creates momentum that cannot be measured or easily stopped.

3. Communicate the Vision Early and Often

Vision leaks.

It’s not enough to cast vision once and assume everyone remembers it. In revitalization work, you must keep the mission in front of the people.

Speak of it in sermons, meetings, newsletters, and personal conversations. Celebrate stories that reflect it. Keep connecting every ministry effort to that bigger picture of renewal.

The more often your church hears and sees the vision lived out, the more it will become part of their identity.

4. Treat People the Way You Want to Be Treated

This principle, found throughout Scripture, is central to revitalization leadership. People follow leaders who care about them, not those who simply direct them.

Church members are more likely to follow a revitalizer who listens, values their input, and treats them with dignity—even when change is hard.

Jesus modeled servant leadership when He washed His disciples’ feet (John 13). True revitalization happens when leaders follow His example—leading not from a place of superiority, but from love and humility.

5. Know Your Stuff—or Be Eager to Learn It

One thing that gives confidence to a congregation in transition is competence. People want to know their leader understands both the spiritual and practical aspects of revitalization.

A good revitalizer doesn’t have all the answers but is always learning. Study church health, leadership, and missional renewal. Seek wisdom from other leaders who’ve walked the same path.

The more you grow, the more your congregation will trust your leadership—and see that you’re committed to guiding them well.

6. Take Responsibility and Admit Mistakes

Leading a church through revitalization means carrying significant responsibility.

As the leader, you are accountable for progress, decisions, and direction. You can delegate tasks—but you can’t delegate responsibility.

When things don’t go as planned, be honest. Admit your mistakes and own your actions. People respect leaders who are transparent and humble far more than those who try to appear perfect.

Authenticity builds credibility. And credibility builds followership.

Final Thoughts

Church revitalization leadership isn’t about holding authority—it’s about earning influence through character and consistency.

When you affirm people’s worth, communicate a clear and hopeful vision, lead with humility, keep learning, and take responsibility, people will want to follow you—not because they have to, but because they believe in where God is leading through you.

The work of revitalization is never easy. It’s slow, prayerful, and deeply relational. But as you lead with grace and courage, you’ll watch God breathe new life into His church—and into His people.

✝️ Revitalizers don’t just rebuild churches—they rekindle faith, hope, and purpose. Lead well, and others will joyfully follow where Christ leads through you.

From Membership to Ownership

From Membership to Ministry: How to Build a Culture Where Everyone Serves, Gives, and Belongs

What if one word could shift your church from passive attendance to passionate participation?

That word is OWNERSHIP.

“We believe every Christ-follower should belong to a local church and take ownership of that church. Ownership includes serving, giving, and participating in biblical community.” — Ron B. Smith Jr.

Ownership isn’t just a buzzword — it’s the DNA of a healthy, growing church. It fuels the five core values every thriving congregation lives by:

  1. Found people find people
  2. Saved people serve people
  3. Growing people change
  4. You can’t do life alone
  5. You can’t out give God

But here’s the truth: Culture starts at the top — and works its way down.

If your church struggles with:

  • “The church just isn’t very generous.”
  • “Nobody ever wants to volunteer.”
  • “People are flaky — I never know if they’ll show up.”

…then it’s time to stop complaining and start leading with ownership.

Here’s how to build an ownership culture in your church — step by practical step.

Step 1: Find the Strengths — Don’t Fixate on Weaknesses

“Focusing on the negative makes you miss the positive — and invites more negativity.”

It’s human nature to see what’s broken. But great leaders see what’s working and amplify it.

Action Steps:

  • Publicly celebrate wins in sermons, emails, and social media. Example: “Last week, 12 people served in children’s ministry — thank you for owning the mission!”
  • Interview 3 faithful volunteers — ask: “What do you love about serving here?”
  • Leverage strengths: If hospitality is strong, expand it. If worship is powerful, invite more musicians.

Pro Tip: Start every leadership meeting with “What’s going right?” before “What needs fixing?”

Step 2: Encourage More Than You Correct

“Encourage more than you correct. Put grace in the bank before you make a withdrawal.”

Paul’s letters always began with thankfulness — even to the messy Corinthians!

Action Steps:

  • Send 3 personal encouragement notes per week (text, email, or handwritten).
  • Use the 5:1 ratio: 5 encouragements for every 1 correction.
  • Model Paul’s pattern:
    1. Grace
    2. Peace
    3. Thanksgiving
    4. Truth in love

Example Script: “I thank God every time I remember you. Your faithfulness in [specific area] is changing lives. Let’s keep growing together in [area of challenge].”

Step 3: Lead Out in the Ownership Role

“The negative culture isn’t all your fault — but changing it is your responsibility.”

You can’t control people. But you can model ownership.

Stop Complaining. Start Solving.

Complaint Ownership Response
“No one serves” “I will serve first and invite others to join me.”
“Giving is low” “I will give generously and teach biblical stewardship.”
“People don’t show up” “I will build community that makes people want to be here.”

Action Steps:

  • Be the first to serve — greet, clean, set up chairs.
  • Share your giving testimony (anonymously if needed).
  • Teach ownership monthly in sermons and small groups.

Key Truth: “The attitude of your followers will eventually reflect how you’re leading.”

Step 4: Give It Away — People Can’t Own What You Keep

“If you own it all, church leaders have nothing to own.”

Your job? Equip. Train. Empower. Release.

Say it loud and often:

“What you do pays your bills — but who you are is a minister in Jesus Christ.”

Action Steps:

  • Create a “Ministry Match” process (more below).
  • Delegate one new responsibility this month.
  • Celebrate when someone leads better than you — that’s success!

Step 5: Never Depend on Your Own Understanding — Ask God

“If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God…” (James 1:5)

Every great leader in Scripture felt in over their head. That’s the point.

Action Steps:

  • Pray daily: “Lord, give me wisdom to lead Your people into ownership.”
  • Form a prayer team for culture change.
  • Fast quarterly as a leadership team for breakthrough.

The 3-2-1 Ownership Launch Plan

3: Educate – Organize – Invite

Step Action
Educate Teach what commitment to Christ means. Don’t assume they know.
Organize Share the church mission/vision (annual theme). Direction fuels commitment.
Invite Call every member to serve. “You are a necessary part of the body” (1 Cor 12:22).

2: Evaluate – Develop

Interview → Engage → Equip → Empower

  1. Engage: Just ask. “Would you pray about serving in [ministry]?”
  2. Equip:
    • Spiritual gifts test
    • Ministry opportunities menu
    • Pair with a mentor
  3. Train:
    • Monthly training tips (email, video, lunch & learn)
    • Use free resources (RightNow Media, Lifeway, etc.)

1: Send

Provide Opportunities – Support – Encourage

  • Launch “Serve Saturdays”
  • Celebrate first-time servers from the stage
  • Follow up within 48 hours: “How was your first Sunday serving?”
  • Support with tools, budget, and prayer

Your church doesn’t need more members. It needs more owners.

Will you lead the way?

Reviving the Church: How God Restores What Seems Dead

God’s people desperately need a biblical foundation for church revitalization. Across the world, too many churches are diminishing, declining, or dying. Even healthy congregations are only a few steps away from spiritual dryness if they lose their focus on God’s mission.

The truth is sobering—but it’s also filled with hope.

A Church of Bones

In Sedlec, Czech Republic, there’s a chapel known as the Church of Bones. It houses the skeletal remains of more than 40,000 people who perished centuries ago. It’s a chilling image—but one that mirrors what happens spiritually when the life of God’s Spirit departs from His people.

Your church doesn’t need a graveyard to be full of dry bones.
When evangelism fades, prayer declines, and worship loses its fire, the pews may still be full—but the hearts can be empty.

Ezekiel knew what that looked like:

“The hand of the Lord was upon me, and he brought me out by the Spirit of the Lord and set me in the middle of a valley; it was full of bones.”
— Ezekiel 37:1 (NIV)

Those bones once belonged to people who were busy—people who had other things to do besides walking closely with God. Their dryness was a sign of distance, discouragement, and disobedience.

When the Church Feels Dry

Just like Israel in exile, today’s churches can grow weary and dry.
Busyness replaces devotion. Activity replaces intimacy. Structure replaces Spirit.

When discouragement takes hold, people quit praying, giving, attending, and worshipping. What remains is a room full of busy people and broken bones.

Dry bones are as dead as you can get—but God asks the same question of us that He asked Ezekiel:

“Son of man, can these bones live?” (Ezekiel 37:3)

Ezekiel’s humble answer should be ours:

“O Sovereign Lord, you alone know.”

What We Need for Revitalization

1. Get a Fresh Word from the Lord

“Prophesy to these bones and say to them, ‘Dry bones, hear the word of the Lord!’”
— Ezekiel 37:4

Ezekiel was told to preach to the bones. What a strange command—but also a powerful one!
Revitalization begins not with human strategy but with divine truth.

The church doesn’t need another self-help plan or leadership seminar—it needs the Word of the Lord. Only God’s Word can speak life into lifeless places.

Whatever you’re facing, God still has something to say. If we listen again to His voice, we’ll find renewal.

2. Get Together

“As I was prophesying, there was a noise, a rattling sound, and the bones came together, bone to bone.”
— Ezekiel 37:7

Revival begins when God’s people start coming together again—when disunity gives way to harmony, and when every believer takes their place in the body.

The church needs its backbones (supporters), leg bones (workers), hands (servants), jawbones (witnesses), and knee bones (prayers).

But God has no room for wishbones—those who wish things were different but won’t help change them—or knucklebones, who just want to fight.

Each of us is a vital part of the body. Alone, we’re just pieces—but together, we can build something beautiful for the Kingdom.

3. Get God’s Spirit

“Prophesy to the breath… and say to it, ‘This is what the Sovereign Lord says: Come from the four winds, O breath, and breathe into these slain, that they may live.’”
— Ezekiel 37:9

“I will put my Spirit in you, and you will live.”
— Ezekiel 37:14

Only God’s Spirit can bring life.
No program, no policy, no pastor can do what the Spirit of God can.

When Israel thought their hope was gone, God said, “You will live.”
When Jesus was crucified, the Father said, “You will live.”
And when the church seems beyond saving, the Holy Spirit still whispers, “You will live.”

God is not in the business of dead things—He brings life to everything He touches.

Final Word: Hear, Gather, and Live

Church revitalization isn’t about preserving an institution—it’s about restoring life.

If you feel spiritually dry, hear the Word of the Lord again.
If your church feels disconnected, come together in unity.
And if all seems lifeless, invite the Spirit of God to breathe anew.

“You will never know that God is all you need until God is all you’ve got.” — Rick Warren

The God who raised dry bones to life can revive your church, your ministry, and your soul.

Let’s believe again that He can—and will—make these bones live.

Making “IT” Worth It: Lessons for Every Church Revitalizer

Church revitalization isn’t for the faint of heart. It’s a journey filled with passion, perseverance, and prayer. As you pour yourself into renewing your congregation and community, one key question remains: How do you make it all worth it?

Here are a few lessons every church revitalizer can take to heart when building lasting value—for yourself, your church, and your community.

1. Your Vision Must Be Compelling

You can’t build value for your members, prospects, volunteers, lay leaders, or your wider community without a compelling vision. People are drawn to clarity and purpose.

Your vision must ignite hope, stir hearts, and answer the “why” behind your mission. A vague or uninspired vision leads to burnout and confusion. But when your vision is clear and Spirit-led, it becomes the driving force that unites people toward transformation.

2. Become a Significant Leader in Your Community

Building value means becoming a trusted leader—not just within your church walls, but throughout your community.

Be the church everyone wants to connect with—the one known for compassion, integrity, and impact. Leading at this level takes courage and confidence. You must be willing to step forward, stake out the territory, and invite others to join you in faith and action.

3. Withstand the Loneliness of Leading Lay People

Leadership can be lonely, especially when you’re guiding others through uncertainty. Every revitalizer faces moments of doubt and weariness.

Acknowledge your humanity. Admit that you don’t always know how the vision will unfold. In doing so, you model authentic leadership that gives others permission to walk with you in faith rather than perfection.

4. Trust Your Laity First—In Time, They Will Trust You

Mutual trust is the foundation of healthy ministry. If you want others to follow through uncertain seasons, start by trusting them first.

Empower your lay leaders. Give them room to lead, to make decisions, and to grow. Over time, that trust will multiply. You’ll begin to see leaders rising up—not just followers—and that’s when real revitalization happens.

5. The True Test of Leadership

For years, I thought leadership was measured by the number of people following me. But I’ve learned that real success is seeing the number of leaders who emerge around you—people who share a common vision and live by shared values.

That’s when you know your revitalization effort is bearing fruit. When your vision and values are alive in others, when people are equipped and inspired to lead—that’s when you’ve truly made “IT” worth it.

Final Thought

Church revitalization is never easy, but it’s always meaningful. When your vision is clear, your leadership is grounded in trust, and your community begins to grow in faith together—you’ll know you’re on the right track.

That’s what makes “IT” worth it.

How Healthy Is Your Sunday?

A Revitalization Coach’s 18-Point Evaluation Form to Transform Your Worship Experience

Practical insights and action steps for pastors, elders, and ministry teams

Sunday is the front door of your church.

It’s not just a service — it’s the weekly moment when the body of Christ gathers to encounter God, be shaped by His Word, and be sent out on mission. But too often, churches treat Sunday like routine instead of revelation.

That’s why you need to evaluate your Sunday service on a regular basis to assess how well a congregation is prepared for supernatural encounter every weekend.

“What happens on Sunday defines what matters to a church and its leaders… and how they’ll experience God’s presence and power.”

Whether you’re a pastor, elder, deacon, or ministry leader, this evaluation will help you see your Sunday through the eyes of a first-time guest.

Phase 1: First Impressions

(Questions 1–7)

Before anyone hears a sermon, they’ve already decided if they’ll return.

1. Are the building and grounds well-maintained? Curb appeal reflects care for God’s house.

Why it matters: The exterior is the first sermon your church preaches. Peeling paint, overgrown shrubs, or cracked sidewalks say, “We don’t care.” A well-kept campus says, “We’re ready for you.”

Red Flags:

  • Trash in parking lot
  • Faded signage
  • Dead plants or un-mowed grass
  • Broken windows or doors

Action Steps:

  • Form a “First Impressions Team” (3–5 volunteers).
  • Walk the property monthly with a checklist.
  • Budget 1–2% of annual income for upkeep.
  • Post a “We’re glad you’re here!” banner at the entrance.

2. Is there sufficient parking for all? Frustration begins in the lot.

Why it matters: Guests should never circle for 10 minutes. Parking stress sets a negative tone before they enter.

Red Flags:

  • No guest parking
  • Reserved spots for staff only
  • Poorly lit or unsafe lot
  • No handicapped access

Action Steps:

  • Reserve 10–15 closest spots for guests.
  • Use bright cones or signs: “Welcome! Park Here!”
  • Train parking team to arrive 45 minutes early.
  • Consider off-site shuttle if space is limited.

3. Are there well-posted signs guiding persons where to go? Confusion kills momentum.

Why it matters: First-timers don’t know where the nursery, restrooms, or worship center is. Clear signage = confidence.

Red Flags:

  • Handwritten or faded signs
  • Missing directional arrows
  • Too many signs (visual clutter)
  • No signs for children’s check-in

Action Steps:

  • Use large, bold, consistent fonts.
  • Place signs at every decision point.
  • Include “You Are Here” maps near entrances.
  • Add digital kiosks if budget allows.

4. Are there welcome, informed, and friendly greeters? A smile + direction = trust.

Why it matters: Greeters are missionaries of first contact. A warm, informed welcome can increase return rate by 20–30%.

Red Flags:

  • Greeters talking among themselves
  • No name tags
  • No knowledge of service times or children’s ministry
  • Standing inside instead of outside doors

Action Steps:

  • Train greeters with a 30-minute script.
  • Ask: “Is this your first time? Let me walk you to your seat!”
  • Give “I’m New” gift (coffee mug, pen, info card).

5. Is the nursery clean, well-supplied, and staffed? Parents judge safety first.

Why it matters: Parents will never return if they don’t trust your children’s ministry. Safety + cleanliness = peace of mind.

Red Flags:

  • No check-in system
  • Toys on floor, stained carpets
  • No background-checked volunteers
  • No pager or text alert system

Action Steps:

  • Use secure check-in software (Planning Center, KidCheck).
  • Clean weekly with checklist (toys, cribs, changing tables).
  • Require 2 adults per room (never 1:1).
  • Post “We Love Kids!” photos on social media.

6. Are Sunday school teachers in the room and prepared early? Readiness shows intentionality.

Why it matters: Teachers arriving late or unprepared signal disorganization. Early presence builds relationships.

Red Flags:

  • Teachers rushing in at start time
  • No name tags or welcome table
  • No lesson plan visible
  • Empty classrooms 10 minutes before start

Action Steps:

  • Teachers arrive 15 minutes early.
  • Greet every child by name.
  • Have welcome activity ready (coloring, puzzle).
  • Send “We missed you!” texts to absentees.

7. Is printed material well-designed and attractively placed? Clutter communicates chaos.

Why it matters: Bulletins, connect cards, and flyers are communication tools, not clutter. Design matters.

Red Flags:

  • Black-and-white photocopies
  • Too much text
  • No clear “Next Steps”
  • Piles of old bulletins

Action Steps:

  • Use software like Canva or Adobe Express for professional design.
  • Include QR code to digital connect card.
  • Place materials in high-traffic areas (not stacked on a table).
  • Limit bulletin to 1 page front/back.

Phase 2: Worship Environment

(Questions 8–15)

The room sets the stage for revelation.

8. Do people sit together or scattered out? Empty pews signal decline.

Why it matters: Scattered seating makes the room feel empty and unwelcoming, even if 70% full.

Red Flags:

  • People spread out like “islands”
  • Back rows filled first
  • No ushers guiding seating
  • No “reserved for guests” signs

Action Steps:

  • Ushers fill from the front.
  • Use “Please sit in the center sections” signs.
  • Block off back 25% until needed.
  • Celebrate “We’re growing!” when overflow is needed.

9. How well does this church connect with the surrounding community? Are newcomers expected?

Why it matters: A church that doesn’t reflect its community will slowly die. Diversity in age, ethnicity, and socioeconomic status is a growth indicator.

Red Flags:

  • 95%+ same demographic
  • No outreach events
  • No social media presence
  • No community partnerships

Action Steps:

  • Host block parties, VBS, food drives.
  • Partner with local schools, police, businesses.
  • Track “How did you hear about us?” on connect cards.
  • Pray for 10 new families by name each week.

10. Is there enough space for all people? Crowded = growth. Cramped = complaint.

Why it matters: 80% capacity is the growth threshold. Over 80% = barriers to new guests.

Red Flags:

  • Standing room only
  • No seats for latecomers
  • Multiple services needed but resisted
  • “We like it cozy” mindset

Action Steps:

  • Launch 2nd service at 70% capacity.
  • Use overflow room with live feed.
  • Train team to add chairs mid-service if needed.
  • Celebrate: “We’re making room for more!”

11. Is the worship centre inviting or stuck in yesterday? Décor should welcome, not repel.

Why it matters: Outdated décor (1970s carpet, faded banners) screams “We stopped growing in 1985!”

Red Flags:

  • Dark paneling, dim lighting
  • Cluttered stage
  • Dead plants or dusty silk flowers
  • No stage branding

Action Steps:

  • Refresh paint every 5 years.
  • Add modern lighting (LED, warm tones).
  • Remove 80% of stage clutter.
  • Display current sermon series graphics.

12. Do worship leaders project preparedness? Distraction kills reverence.

Why it matters: Worship leaders are spiritual guides. Technical glitches or disorganization pull focus from God.

Red Flags:

  • Sound checks during service
  • Lyrics not ready
  • Band members late
  • No rehearsal

Action Steps:

  • Week night rehearsal (full run-through).
  • Sound check 60 minutes before.
  • Use Planning Center (or similar software) for song planning.
  • Train team: “We’re not performing — we’re leading worship.”

13. Is the music inspiring? Worship isn’t a warmup act.

Why it matters: Music sets the emotional and spiritual tone. It should lift hearts, not just fill time.

Red Flags:

  • Songs no one knows
  • Off-key or out-of-tune
  • Too loud or too soft
  • No blend of hymns and modern

Action Steps:

  • Choose 3–4 songs per service (2 familiar, 1–2 new).
  • Use multi-generational playlist.
  • Record worship moments for social media.
  • Ask: “Did this draw us closer to God?”

14. Is there a spirit of expectancy? Faith anticipates God’s move.

Why it matters: People come hungry for God. Expectancy is contagious.

Red Flags:

  • Routine, robotic feel
  • No prayer for salvation
  • No altar call or response time
  • Pastor seems distracted

Action Steps:

  • Start with “God is here!” declaration.
  • Share testimonies weekly.
  • End with clear gospel invitation.
  • Train team to pray expectantly all week.

15. Does worship flow well — or do announcements kill momentum? Bulletins exist for a reason.

Why it matters: Flow = focus on God. 5-minute announcements kill momentum.

Red Flags:

  • Pastor reads every bulletin item
  • No video announcements
  • No pre-service slides
  • Awkward pauses
  • Worship leader talks too much

Action Steps:

  • Move 95% of announcements to:
    • Bulletin
    • Pre-service slides
    • 60-second video
  • Keep verbal announcements to 60 seconds max.
  • Use “One Big Ask” per week.
  • Limit how often worship leader explains song

Phase 3: The Message & Takeaway

(Questions 16–18)

People remember what moves them.

16. Did the pastor communicate the gospel clearly? Clarity > cleverness.

Why it matters: The gospel must be clear, compelling, and applicable. Jargon confuses; stories connect.

Red Flags:

  • 47-minute sermon with no point
  • No application
  • No gospel presentation
  • Too many Greek/Hebrew words

Action Steps:

  • End with “Here’s what to do this week.”
  • Offer sermon-based small groups.

17. What was the highlight of the worship experience? Name the moment God showed up.

Why it matters: People remember moments, not minutes. Identify what moved them.

Red Flags:

  • “I don’t know”
  • “The coffee was good”
  • No emotional or spiritual peak
  • No response time

Action Steps:

  • Build one “God moment” per service (testimony, baptism, prayer).
  • Use lighting, silence, or music to highlight.
  • Ask congregation: “When did you feel closest to God?”
  • Share highlights in weekly email.

18. What did you take away from this worship service? Transformation, not just information.

Why it matters: People should leave changed, not just informed.

Red Flags:

  • “Nice service”
  • No next step
  • No connect card filled out
  • No prayer or commitment

Action Steps:

  • End with clear next step:
    • “Fill out connect card”
    • “Join a group”
    • “Text ‘GROW’ to 555–1234”
  • Follow up within 48 hours.
  • Track “I will…” commitments.

Bonus: The 3 Questions Every Church Must Answer

After the evaluation, ask your team:

  1. Are we excellent at the essentials?
  2. Are we removing barriers to faith?
  3. Are we expecting God to move?

 

Sunday isn’t just a service. It’s a sending. Make it count.

Letting Go of Ministries That No Longer Serve: Pruning for a Thriving Church

I recently moved and my new home has fruit trees. I know nothing about fruit trees, so I went to YouTube to learn about caring for apple, pear, and cherry trees. All the experts emphasize the importance of regular pruning to maintain a healthy, growing tree. They also acknowledged how scary pruning can be for the novice gardener since they do not want to cut off too much and damage the tree – but the pruning needs to be done. The same principle is true in revitalization as well: pruning=health & growth.

In my time as a revitalizer, this is without a doubt one of the hardest things I’ve had to do because every church has its sacred cows—those once-thriving ministries that now limp along on life support. The annual chili cook-off that used to pack the fellowship hall. The midweek program with three faithful attendees and a budget line that could fund a mission trip. The tradition everyone loves… but no one can remember why.

Here’s the hard truth: Holding on to ineffective ministries isn’t loyalty. It’s sabotage.

Letting go isn’t betrayal. It’s pruning—the painful but necessary cut that redirects life to new growth (John 15:2). If your church is in revitalization, this is non-negotiable. Here’s how to do it with grace, wisdom, and unshakable vision.

Step 1: Face the Facts (Recognize the Signs of Decline)

Sentimentality clouds judgment. Ask the tough questions:

  • Attendance: Are the same 5 people showing up… and one is the leader’s spouse?
  • Impact: When’s the last time this ministry led someone to Christ, discipled a believer, or served the community?
  • Resources: Is it consuming 20% of the budget for 2% of the fruit?

Red Flag: If you’re propping it up “for Mrs. Edna,” it’s already dead.

Be ruthless with data, gentle with people. Declining ministries aren’t failures—they’re former successes that have completed their mission.

Step 2: Honour the Past (But Don’t Live There)

Every ministry had a season. Celebrate it.

  • Host a “Ministry Memorial Service” — share stories, show old photos, thank volunteers.
  • Create a “Wall of Impact” — plaques or a digital slideshow in the lobby.
  • Publicly thank the founders: “Because of your faithfulness in 1998, 47 kids came to Christ. That season is complete—now God’s doing a new thing.”

Principle: People don’t resist change. They resist loss. Honor the past so they can release it.

Step 3: Involve the Congregation (Transparency Builds Buy-In)

Don’t decide in a leadership bubble. Crowdsource wisdom:

  • Town Hall Q&A: “Does the Tuesday quilting ministry still align with our mission to reach young families?”
  • Anonymous Surveys: “What ministries feel life-giving? Draining?”
  • Focus Groups: Invite critics and champions to the table.

You’ll be shocked—often the loudest defenders are secretly relieved when it ends.

Step 4: Measure Against Vision (Not Nostalgia)

Post your church’s 3-year vision on the wall. Now hold the ministry up to it:

Ministry Supports Vision? Resource Drain Verdict
Wednesday Night Visitation ❌ (0 salvations in 2 yrs) High (gas, time) Cut
Community Food Pantry ✅ (serves 200/month) Moderate Keep & Expand

If it doesn’t propel you toward disciple-making, community impact, or next-gen reach, it’s baggage.

Step 5: Execute a Graceful Exit (No Ghosting)

Abrupt endings breed resentment. Plan the funeral:

  1. Announce 90 days out: “After prayerful evaluation, we’re sunsetting X on [date].”
  2. Host a final celebration: Potluck, testimonials, prayer.
  3. Redirect people: “Jane, your gift for hospitality would crush it in our new neighborhood outreach.”
  4. Repurpose resources: Announce the new initiative the budget will fund.

Pro Move: Tie the ending to a launch. “The $3,000 from the craft fair now seeds our foster care ministry.”

Step 6: Redirect with Purpose (Death Funds Life)

Empty calendars and budgets are holy opportunities. Don’t let them sit idle.

Examples of Redirection:

  • Old VBS budget → Summer serve days in low-income schools.
  • Empty Wednesday night building → Alpha course for skeptics.
  • Freed-up leaders → Mentor 12 emerging disciples.

Show the win. Post photos of the new ministry in action. Momentum snowballs.

Step 7: Trust God in the Tension

Change stirs grief. Expect pushback. Respond with:

  • Prayer: Lead a 40-day prayer focus for the new thing God’s birthing.
  • Scripture: Preach John 12:24 — “Unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies…”
  • Pastoral Care: Meet one-on-one with the displaced. Help them find their next “yes.”

Leader’s Promise: “I’d rather bury a ministry than let it bury our mission.”

The Payoff: Space for Resurrection

When you let go, you don’t just free up a budget line. You free up faith.

I’ve seen churches:

  • End a dying choir → launch a worship night that draws 100 unchurched 20-somethings.
  • Cancel a redundant Bible study → start addiction recovery groups that save marriages.
  • Sell the unused parsonage → fund a youth intern who disciples 30 teens.

Letting go isn’t loss. It’s leverage.

Your Next Step

  1. List 3 ministries that feel more like museum pieces than mission.
  2. Schedule a leadership meeting this week to evaluate one.
  3. Draft the celebration plan before you announce the cut.

“Saying goodbye to what was isn’t defeat. It’s the sound of a church choosing resurrection over rigor mortis.”

The graveyard of dead ministries is where thriving churches plant their future. Start digging.

A Prayer-Powered Plan for Church Revitalization: Building Your Spiritual War Room

Church revitalization isn’t a boardroom project—it’s a battlefield. The enemy despises renewal, and he’ll throw every weapon at you: discouragement, division, distraction. Ephesians 6:12 doesn’t mince words: “We do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against… spiritual forces of evil.” If you’re leading a church through turnaround, your first and fiercest strategy isn’t a new logo or launch event. It’s prayer. Not polite bedtime prayers, but wartime intercession that storms heaven and shifts atmospheres.

You can’t win this alone. You need a prayer team—your spiritual special forces. Here’s a battle-tested plan to build one, fuel it, and watch God turn a dying church into a thriving outpost of His kingdom.

The Power of Prayer Partners: You Can’t Fight Solo

Revitalization is a 3–5 year slog through spiritual trenches. Satan will target your marriage, your health, your vision. Personal prayer is non-negotiable, but it’s not enough. You need prayer cover.

Your #1 move as a revitalizer: Recruit at least 10 committed prayer warriors.

These aren’t casual “thoughts and prayers” people. They’re intercessors who’ll fast, weep, and war in the Spirit for you and the church. This isn’t optional—it’s the single most predictive factor of revitalization success.

Step 1: Recruit Your Prayer Team (Start with 10, Scale to Hundreds)

Don’t wait for volunteers. Ask boldly.

  1. Brainstorm 10 names — faithful pray-ers from your past: former church members, mentors, family, neighbors.
  2. Call or meet them personally. Share the vision: “God’s calling us to breathe life into this church. I can’t do it without your prayers.”
  3. Tap networks: Ask your associational missionary for email lists. Use opt-in forms, not spam.
  4. Empower recruiters: Each of your 10 invites 10 more. Exponential growth starts here.

Pro Tip: Include non-churchgoers. A praying grandma down the street might be your mightiest warrior.

Step 2: Give Them Something to Pray For (Be Specific)

Vague prayers fizzle. Arm your team with targeted, heartfelt requests:

  • For you: Wisdom, endurance, humility, protection from burnout.
  • For your family: Unity, health, joy amid the strain.
  • For the church: Vision clarity, core team formation, financial breakthrough.
  • Against the enemy: Bind division, deception, apathy.

“Lord, protect Pastor Mark’s marriage this week. Give him supernatural patience with the finance committee. Raise up 12 disciples ready to rebuild.”

Specificity breeds faith. Faith moves mountains.

Step 3: Keep the Team Connected (Communication = Oxygen)

A silent prayer team dies. Use weekly updates to stoke the fire:

  • Tools: Use Facebook, WhatsApp, or any other social media tool that works for your group
  • Website: Create a Prayer Team signup form for your church web page
  • Low-tech options: Mailed letters, prayer cards in pews.

Sample Email Structure:

Subject: Urgent Prayer: Unity in Sunday’s Vote

  1. Victory report (last week’s win)
  2. 3 specific requests (this week)
  3. Scripture to claim
  4. Call to action (fast Wednesday?)

Step 4: Build a Prayer Culture (From Emails to Battle Stations)

Don’t stop at updates. Embed prayer into the church’s DNA:

  • Appoint a Prayer Champion — someone to rally, remind, and recruit.
  • Monthly Prayer & Fasting Days — corporate hunger breeds breakthrough.
  • Prayer Walks — circle your building, neighbourhoods, schools.
  • 24-Hour Prayer Marathon — sign-up slots for round-the-clock coverage.
  • Weekly Prayer Meeting — even if it’s just 5 people at first.

Goal: Prayer isn’t an event. It’s the air your church breathes.

Why This Matters: You’re Not Fixing a Church—You’re Reclaiming Kingdom Ground

Revitalization without prayer is like storming a beachhead with no air support. You’ll take hits you can’t see coming.

But a leader backed by a praying army? Unstoppable.

“The church that prays together, stays together—and turns the tide.”

Your Next Move: Start Today

  1. List 10 names (right now).
  2. Call the first one before dinner.
  3. Send your first prayer email this week.

Revitalization doesn’t begin with a vote or a vision casting service. It begins on your knees, surrounded by warriors who refuse to let you fall.

“Grab your 10. Send that email. Watch God move.”

The church isn’t dying—it’s being reborn. And prayer is the delivery room.